Im at my friend`s house now. I just went to pierce my nose, and it wasnt as pain as i expected. Damn it, i miss marcus so much now. hais.. I wonder what he is doing now. Everywhere i go, i see couples and i`ll think of him & me.. when i watch tv, all i see is lovey dovey couples. Hais.. i remembered that on saturday or sunday, i watched a show about how the guy left the girl bcos of another woman with bigger boobs and it was really so so sad, and i cried.

I am really trying very hard not to contact him but i really cant. I miss the nights whereby we`ll talk to each other, the msges he sent and everything. Today, while i was having PE lessons, my friends told me my phone rang and so many thoughts came into my mind, i tot he had called me.. but actually it wasnt. My phone accidentally went to the music player. Hais.. I really wonder if he is happier w/o me now bcos i know i aint happier without him. Im numb to the pain already, but my heart still aches every now and than and i really keep thinking of him every minute, every second. Hais..I really miss him so much. All my friends have got their dates for valentine`s day tmrw and me? I guess i`ll lock myself at home to prevent myself from seeing all those couples out there, it`ll only make me wanna cry. ( ::"-":: ) I also cant help wondering who will marcus`s valentine be, will it be tht girl? Or will he just be spending it with him friends? I rmb that it was just last last week when i asked him whether he was gonna buy a vday pressie for me. I already planned everything properly, from what im gonna buy and how im gonna surprise him. I wanted to buy the adidas watch he had been aiming for so long, i wanted to bake a cake too, but yet all this had to happen now. Hais..

Marcus, if you`re reading this, i really miss you so. Come back to me will you? I dont care if this is gonna happen a third time, fourth time or wad, all i know is that i really need you and im really so lost without you. hais. Even if you dont love me any longer, can you bear to see me in this state? ( T-T ) I love you, i really do.